A Day in the Life

In Georgia’s first year of life, we went to a lot of doctor’s appointments… a ridiculous amount.  The number of specialists she sees is overwhelming for a grown adult, but for an infant, it was awful.  She didn’t understand why we had to drive an hour or more into Atlanta to see a new group of strangers every week.  Every car ride was dreadful… she’d scream the entire ride & I would wind up pulled over on the interstate in tears, begging God for help.  We were always late, due to traffic, rain, life in general. At the appointments, there were always more tears, and some awful, uncomfortable event (think needles, camera scopes in her nose, awful conversations about the impending death of our baby) that confirmed the car ride home would be just as awful as the ride there.  On the days we had these appointments, she wouldn’t eat well, she wouldn’t nap, and would be a shell of herself.  By the time we were home, I’d literally strip both of us out of our clothes and have to completely zone out and veg because I was so emotionally exhausted. There was no point of those twelve months of appointments that I would like to relive.
At a year old, most of our specialists cleared us for anywhere from 6-12 months… which meant, NO MORE CRAZY DRIVES & APPOINTMENTS!  Whew.  And today, when we made the trip into Atlanta for her feeding therapy assessment, the car ride was, blissfully calm.  I couldn’t help but feel incredibly grateful for that moment.  I sipped my coffee, listened to my music, and enjoyed the cooing of my daughter in the backseat.  God has been so good to us.  We have come so far from the days of the tiny five pound infant screaming and holding her breath while I cry and panic in bumper to bumper traffic.
Ah, but toddlers are still toddlers.
And the second the nurse walked in, Georgia hit that switch.  Oh man, did she hit the switch.  No smiles, no cooing, no playing… it was high-pitched screams the whole place could hear.  She may be considered disabled, but there is nothing disabled about her tantrums– they seem pretty typical to me.
And on the car ride home, I felt that same exhaustion.  I guess in motherhood, you have your highs & you have your lows.  You have the moments your daughter is smiling, participating in your sing-a-longs, reaching for your face, and making your heart burst with pride, and then she’s kicking you in the face in front of a complete stranger.
Welcome to motherhood.
Just a day in the life.

One Comment

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    Everyday I open my Facebook and I see lots of pictures and stories of that beautiful little girl … makes me smile … one of the better parts about Facebook …. see what great parents do for there children … I pray evrytime for you to have whatever streagnth you need and for your daughter to progress … thank you

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